Suitably Flip

From The Desk of My Esteemed Self

As I've noted, I'm a sucker for a good Nigerian 419 scam.  Maybe it's their uncanny ability to slip through spam filters.  Maybe it's the fantastical tales of royalty and tragedy and international intrigue that one's treated to.  But I think the primary appeal is the glowingly flattering language (always in slightly broken English) they use.  I suppose the thinking is that "marks" are put off guard when being aggressively complimented?

Anyway, I'm reliably amused by these attempts to slake my desire to rip off the estates of foreign dignitaries.

Here's one such missive that graced my inbox this morning:

Dear one,

This letter is not intended to cause any embarrassment in whatever form, rather it is intended to contact your esteemed self, following the knowledge of your high reputation and trust worthiness.

Firstly, I must solicit your confidentiality. I know that a proposal of this magnitude will make anyone apprehensive and worried, but I am assuring you that it is made in good faith and will be for mutual benefit for the both of us.

My name is Mr DANEIL RAY  the Manger, Credit and Foreign Bills (UNION BANK PLC), I am writing in respect of a foreign customer of my bank with account number 14-225-2000 who perished in a plane crash (Korean Air flight 801) with the whole passengers aboard on August 5th ,1997. Since the demise of this our customer, I personally has watched as no one has come to claim his funds of $2.8 (two million,eight hundred thousand Dollars Only) which has been with my branch for a very long time.

On this note , I decided to seek for whom his name shall be used as the next of kin as no one has come up to be next of kin . And the banking ethics here does not allow such money to stay. In view of this I got your contact through a Trade Journal after realizing that your name and country is similar to the deceased. You and I can then share the money 60% to me and 40% to you

Upon the receipt of your response, I will send you by fax the application and the next step to take. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this business is hitch free and that you should not entertain any fear as all modalities for fund transfer can be finalized within five banking days, after you apply to the bank as a relation to the deceased.

When you receive this letter, kindly send me a mail signifying your decision including your private Tel/Fax numbers for quick communication.

thanks.

MR DANEIL RAY

Comments

From The Desk of My Esteemed Self

As I've noted, I'm a sucker for a good Nigerian 419 scam.  Maybe it's their uncanny ability to slip through spam filters.  Maybe it's the fantastical tales of royalty and tragedy and international intrigue that one's treated to.  But I think the primary appeal is the glowingly flattering language (always in slightly broken English) they use.  I suppose the thinking is that "marks" are put off guard when being aggressively complimented?

Anyway, I'm reliably amused by these attempts to slake my desire to rip off the estates of foreign dignitaries.

Here's one such missive that graced my inbox this morning:

Dear one,

This letter is not intended to cause any embarrassment in whatever form, rather it is intended to contact your esteemed self, following the knowledge of your high reputation and trust worthiness.

Firstly, I must solicit your confidentiality. I know that a proposal of this magnitude will make anyone apprehensive and worried, but I am assuring you that it is made in good faith and will be for mutual benefit for the both of us.

My name is Mr DANEIL RAY  the Manger, Credit and Foreign Bills (UNION BANK PLC), I am writing in respect of a foreign customer of my bank with account number 14-225-2000 who perished in a plane crash (Korean Air flight 801) with the whole passengers aboard on August 5th ,1997. Since the demise of this our customer, I personally has watched as no one has come to claim his funds of $2.8 (two million,eight hundred thousand Dollars Only) which has been with my branch for a very long time.

On this note , I decided to seek for whom his name shall be used as the next of kin as no one has come up to be next of kin . And the banking ethics here does not allow such money to stay. In view of this I got your contact through a Trade Journal after realizing that your name and country is similar to the deceased. You and I can then share the money 60% to me and 40% to you

Upon the receipt of your response, I will send you by fax the application and the next step to take. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this business is hitch free and that you should not entertain any fear as all modalities for fund transfer can be finalized within five banking days, after you apply to the bank as a relation to the deceased.

When you receive this letter, kindly send me a mail signifying your decision including your private Tel/Fax numbers for quick communication.

thanks.

MR DANEIL RAY