Suitably Flip

Abject Idiocy

While I've continued to scratch my head about the 40% reduction in New York's Urban Area Security Initiative allocation (even more so as we subsequently learned about an aborted cyanide bomb attack on the City's subways in 2003 and a recently foiled tunnel bombing plot), certain pieces of the puzzle are starting to fall into place.

It may be only because I live in New York that I find it to be so chock full of important landmarks, icons, and symbols.  Perhaps when viewed objectively in comparison with other localities, it simply isn't the case.  Take the great states of Indiana or Wisconsin for instance.  According to the National Asset Database, used by Homeland Security to identify likely terror targets, both states are far more target-filled.  Indiana, as it turns out, is the most target-rich state in the nation, with 8,591instances of terror bait.  Wisconsin comes in second with 7,146, while New York runs a distance third with 5,687.

We're crossing over from just plain misguided to certifiably nuts.

And if you're wondering whether the creators of the database are simply taking a more *nuanced* view of what constitutes a "target", perhaps moving away from focal points like financial centers and national monuments, well, you're part right.  They are indeed focusing on some, er... less obvious sites.

It reads like a tally of terrorist targets that a child might have written: Old MacDonald’s Petting Zoo, the Amish Country Popcorn factory, the Mule Day Parade, the Sweetwater Flea Market and an unspecified “Beach at End of a Street.”

... Brian Lehman, said he owned the only operation  in the country with [the name Amish Country Popcorn.]

“I am out in the middle of nowhere,” said Mr. Lehman, whose business in Berne, Ind., has five employees and grows and distributes popcorn. “We are nothing but a bunch of Amish buggies and tractors out here. No one would care.”

But moving the focus to the middle of nowhere doesn't quite bound the absurdity of the database.  When it does consider [yawn] financial centers and national monuments (do terrorists even care about such things anymore?), it puts on a show of dazzling inaptitude for counting.

New York, for example, lists only 2 percent of the nation’s banking and finance sector assets, which ranks it between North Dakota and Missouri. Washington State lists nearly twice as many national monuments and icons as the District of Columbia.

Someone's not just asleep at the switch.  Someone labeled the switch upside down, or spilled coffee on the switch, or accidentally flushed the switch down the toilet and is embarrassed to tell anyone.

Someone needs to commandeer the swtich.

(Hat tip: Alert reader Pat in Indiana.  Pat, you might want to find yourself a sturdy bomb shelter pronto.)

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Abject Idiocy

While I've continued to scratch my head about the 40% reduction in New York's Urban Area Security Initiative allocation (even more so as we subsequently learned about an aborted cyanide bomb attack on the City's subways in 2003 and a recently foiled tunnel bombing plot), certain pieces of the puzzle are starting to fall into place.

It may be only because I live in New York that I find it to be so chock full of important landmarks, icons, and symbols.  Perhaps when viewed objectively in comparison with other localities, it simply isn't the case.  Take the great states of Indiana or Wisconsin for instance.  According to the National Asset Database, used by Homeland Security to identify likely terror targets, both states are far more target-filled.  Indiana, as it turns out, is the most target-rich state in the nation, with 8,591instances of terror bait.  Wisconsin comes in second with 7,146, while New York runs a distance third with 5,687.

We're crossing over from just plain misguided to certifiably nuts.

And if you're wondering whether the creators of the database are simply taking a more *nuanced* view of what constitutes a "target", perhaps moving away from focal points like financial centers and national monuments, well, you're part right.  They are indeed focusing on some, er... less obvious sites.

It reads like a tally of terrorist targets that a child might have written: Old MacDonald’s Petting Zoo, the Amish Country Popcorn factory, the Mule Day Parade, the Sweetwater Flea Market and an unspecified “Beach at End of a Street.”

... Brian Lehman, said he owned the only operation  in the country with [the name Amish Country Popcorn.]

“I am out in the middle of nowhere,” said Mr. Lehman, whose business in Berne, Ind., has five employees and grows and distributes popcorn. “We are nothing but a bunch of Amish buggies and tractors out here. No one would care.”

But moving the focus to the middle of nowhere doesn't quite bound the absurdity of the database.  When it does consider [yawn] financial centers and national monuments (do terrorists even care about such things anymore?), it puts on a show of dazzling inaptitude for counting.

New York, for example, lists only 2 percent of the nation’s banking and finance sector assets, which ranks it between North Dakota and Missouri. Washington State lists nearly twice as many national monuments and icons as the District of Columbia.

Someone's not just asleep at the switch.  Someone labeled the switch upside down, or spilled coffee on the switch, or accidentally flushed the switch down the toilet and is embarrassed to tell anyone.

Someone needs to commandeer the swtich.

(Hat tip: Alert reader Pat in Indiana.  Pat, you might want to find yourself a sturdy bomb shelter pronto.)